What have I learnt from previous experiences? Sometimes I just do nothing, hoping that it will go away by itself. It never does. Problems that stress us, crises, small and big, need to be dealt with. I have been through crises, many times. Just like everybody else.

A crisis is something other than a difficult time, but again it depends on personality. What is a crisis to me can look like a challenge or maybe like a silly little incident to somebody else.

Dealing with a crisis always does something to me. It changes me, it teaches me something, either about other people or about the society, but mostly about myself. After having been through a few, I learnt to take my crises more seriously.

I learnt that to me it helps giving it a lot of thought and I learnt to seek advice. Over the years I feel I have become less afraid of crises. I have learnt that normally things sort themselves. Whatever happens is what happens and normally it is for the best.

Not that I haven’t made some horrible mistakes, at least it looked like that, but looking back, were they mistakes? Or were they merely intuitive, but painful ways to a better life?

A crisis is an opportunity to learn and to move on in life. I guess I am talking mostly about personal crisis, I find crises like the tsunami more difficult to understand, although I know that some people look upon crisis of this kind as something Mother Earth has to take seriously and deal with somehow.

The same thing with 9.11. I think it is difficult to understand that so many people had to suffer, but it was an opportunity for the US Government to give their foreign policy another thought.

Back to my stress.

How do I know that I am stressed? I get restless. I sleep without much peace according to my partner. I read a lot. I think I read because I like the book. I do like the book, but a book can also be an escape.

All the things I do keep me busy, and keep me from dealing with the problem. I postpone. Maybe I don’t know what to do with it, or maybe I am scared to do anything, because I am afraid that it will be unpleasant? Maybe I am afraid of the consequences?

Maybe somebody will get angry? Maybe I have not learnt to deal with stress when I was young? For my own sake, I remember that showing anger was not accepted. Little girls should be seen and not heard, I was told. Anger can be both healthy and damaging.

I had to learn that getting angry was not always dangerous, but still I get this uneasy feeling when I get angry. I wonder what it is. Maybe I think that somebody important will not love me anymore if I am angry and make life unpleasant. But than again, I think, that is not my responsibility. I have to take care of myself and do what is important for me.

No, it is not that easy either; I live in a society and there are certain rules to be followed. Is this what makes me stressed? Being middle aged and still afraid of being put outside, and still looking for “parents” to love me, angry or not?

Maybe this is the case with the USA also? She is still a young child. What I have learnt also, is that I deal with my stress when I am ready. Somehow I will know when I am ready.

I will ask for, and take advice, but only I will know when I am ready to deal with my problem. This is what I have learnt, but do I always follow my own knowledge? No, I am still learning.